Couples often get caught up in the honeymoon phase when they’ve just started dating and forget to ask the important questions.

And when reality sets in, people often realise that they’ve formed a connection with someone without even finding out what the name of their first pet was.

These tidbits of information might seem trivial, but learning all of your significant other’s quirks, likes and dislikes is essential if you want a long-lasting relationship.

You don’t have to know every aspect of their life story, but having a good idea of their background and experiences is the bare minimum, according to this therapist.

Jeff Guenther, who is better known online as TherapyJeff, believes that people should know their romantic partner well enough after hitting the 12-month mark.

The expert – who specialises in marriage and family therapy as well as child development – reckons that it might be a red flag if you’re still getting introduced to new things about your romantic partner a year down the line.

I mean, to be fair, what the hell have you been doing for the last 365 days if you’ve not been getting to know one another?

Jeff Guenther believes couples should be experts on each other after a year of dating (TikTok/@therapyjeff)

The 12 Questions

If you want to see how familiar your other half is with all the crucial facts they should know about you, Jeff’s got the perfect quiz for you to try out.

He has helped hundreds of couples work through their issues at his private therapy practice in Portland, Oregon, over the years – so he knows his stuff.

Due to his experience assisting couples navigating treacherous waters and educating young lovers, the therapist believes he has gained a good idea of what an authentic relationship should be like.

It’s not all sunshine and rainbows, according to the Big Dating Energy author, but if you work on your trust, communication, support and intimacy, it’s worth it in the end.

That’s why he came up with a Mr and Mrs-style quiz which will help you understand if you and your partner are on the same page.

In a video shared to TikTok, Jeff said: “You should be able to answer these 12 questions after dating someone for one year.”

Take a look at the list of questions below, which we’ve divided into different categories.

Quiz your partner on these 12 questions to see how well they know you (Getty Stock Photo)

Wants and needs

1. What’s something in the relationship that makes them upset that they just can’t quite get over or let go of yet?
2. When they need support, what works best? Being hugged, heard, helped or humped?
3. What is their favourite emotional support food?
4. What personality quirk, physical gesture or turn of phrase have they picked up from you and now use regularly?

Nearest and dearest

1. What is their overall feeling about each person in their immediate family?
2. Who is their best friend and why is that their best friend?
3. What is their biggest fear or insecurity and how does it show up in their life?
4. What’s their go-to way to destress after a really bad day?

The future and feelings

1. What’s their opinion on their career or current life path? Are they content, conflicted, or craving change?
2. What’s one thing about you that they secretly love, but would never openly admit?
3. What’s the one boundary they are most protective of and why is it so important to them?
4. What’s the one topic that’s guaranteed to make them rant for at least 15 minutes straight?

Jeff urged people to give the questions a go with their significant other, while social media users flooded the comment section with their thoughts.

One said: “Me and my husband just had a great conversation going through this list. Thank you!

Another wrote: “This is really sweet. I need someone to know me like this.”

A third chimed in: “How can you not know this about your partner after three weeks?”

A fourth joked: “I suppose after 15 years, I ought to nail this down.”

And a fifth added: “Perfect score for both of us…at 18+ years!”

So…what are you waiting for? Go and tell your beau you’ve got 12 questions to quiz them on!

ing in the modern world is often a minefield.

Thanks to the creation of apps such as Tinder, Bumble and Hinge, looking for a date is often just a swipe away from us – meaning that, in theory, looking for love should be easier than ever.

Unfortunately it doesn’t always work out that way, with most of us spending ages swiping through dozens of profiles and suffering the excruciating small talk before finally securing a date.

Things don’t become much easier once the conversation moves into the real world either, as first dates often end up with both of you sat in awkward silence after realising you don’t have much in common.

Looking to make sure you’re not wasting time on a bad first date? Australian dating expert Louanne Ward has revealed some body language red flags you should look out for.

Sharing the advice on her Instagram account – @louanneward – the matchmaker detailed seven ‘tell-tale’ signs that someone isn’t interested in you.

Looking for a date is often just a swipe away from us. (Getty Stock Image)

Closed arms

One of the easiest ones to spot is closed arms, with Louanne writing that crossed arms are a key sign that someone has closed themselves off to you.

“Crossed arms create a barrier, suggesting a defensive and closed-off attitude,” she said.

Leaning away

Leaning away is another sign, with the action showing that someone is subconsciously trying to distance themselves from you.

“If they consistently lean away from you, it signifies a desire to create physical distance and disengage,” Louanne explained.

Our body language doesn’t lie. (Getty Stock Image)

Minimal eye contact

Making eye contact with others, especially during intense scenarios can feel a little daunting – but looking into your date’s eyes is an important sign that you’re into them.

Avoiding eye contact or constantly looking away can indicate a ‘lack of interest or discomfort’ in someone.

Lack of engagement

Having a conversation with someone shouldn’t feel difficult or one-sided, if it does this is another sign someone isn’t interested in getting to know you. Louanne said that an uninterested person may show this by ‘not actively participating in the conversation, offering short or monosyllabic responses, or seeming distracted’.

Limited touch

Physical touch is an important way of building a romantic connection with someone. Granted some people may not be overly comfortable with physical touch, but it can be a key sign of disinterest.

Louanne noted that anyone actively trying to avoid touch or keep a distance from you could well be showing their lack of interest.

Dating expert Louanne Ward. (Instagram/@louanneward)

Absence of mirroring

According to Louanne, when we’re interested we ‘tend to mirror the body language of the other person subconsciously’. Therefore a lack of mirroring can reveal the absence of an emotional connection.

Preoccupation

Seeing someone pull out their phone on a date is a clear indicator that the date is going south. Louanne added that a person who’s more interested in checking their phone or looking around the room has a ‘disinterest in the current interaction’.

The dating expert concluded her post by writing: “Remember, while these body language cues may indicate disinterest, it’s essential to consider them in conjunction with verbal communication and the overall context.

“If you observe several of these signs, it might be time to gracefully move on and find someone who truly appreciates your company!”

It’s fair to say most people go out of their way to make themselves more attractive.

You can splash hundreds of pounds on makeup, clothing, or beauty treatments to improve your appearance, but it doesn’t guarantee that you’re going to have admirers falling at your feet.

Rather than focusing on how you look, you might be better off concentrating on what’s on the inside instead – as according to this relational psychotherapist,there is one trait that instantly makes you ten times more attractive to people.

Claire Law, a counsellor and relational psychotherapist, reckons that this certain quality is a brilliant ‘green flag’on first dates which screams ‘I’m comfortable in my own skin’ to the person on the other side of the table.

So, what is the mystery characteristic which will ensure that your date is drooling over you?

According to Claire, it’s self-assurance – which means you are confident in your own abilities, character, and what you can bring to the relationship without being cocky about it.

She told Metro: “Who wouldn’t want a partner like that? Someone who’s not constantly seeking validation or approval. A self-assured partner won’t be clingy or needy – they’ll have their own thing going on, which is really sexy.”

The psychotherapist and writer explained that this gets other people going because it subconsciously suggests that you may also have a load of other positive qualities which people look for when trying to find love.

Self assurance is the ‘green flag’ that makes you more attractive. (Getty Stock Photos)

“These other qualities are emotional maturity, stability, and resilience,” she continued.

“If you’re self-assured, you’re probably pretty good at managing your emotions, coping with stress and making decisions.

“These are all things that make for a solid, healthy relationship.

“Self-assurance is such an attractive quality because it telegraphs a certain attitude to the world.

“Self-assured people tend to be more at peace with themselves… they’ve made their peace with their strengths and weaknesses.”

But how can you translate all of this stuff to your date without spelling out the fact you are self-confident?

How to show more self-confidence

Claire suggests that you should make this clear from the very first moment you see the person you are meeting – so you could bound over and give them a hug or kiss on the cheek, without even thinking twice about it.

“Stand tall, make eye contact, smile warmly. Don’t fidget or cross your arms – that makes you look closed off and nervous,” she explained.

Follow up from there with some ‘balanced conversation’, once you’ve got the pleasantries out of the way.

(Getty Stock Photos)

The relational psychotherapist reckons you should ask plenty of questions while also sharing lots about yourself, as a ‘self-assured person isn’t afraid to open up’.

Adding: “Be decisive. If your date asks for your opinion on something, give it. Don’t hem and haw or say ‘I don’t know, what do you think?’ all the time.

“Be willing to respectfully disagree. If you have a different opinion, voice it calmly and confidently. A self-assured person can handle a little friendly debate.

“Order what you want, not what you think your date wants you to order. Speak up if you’re uncomfortable.”

But just remember if you’re using Claire’s advice on your next date – there’s a fine line between self-confidence and vanity.

She said: “It’s about being true to yourself and communicating that authentically. Self-assurance isn’t about putting on an act or being arrogant.

“It’s about knowing your worth and embodying that in how you carry yourself and interact with others.

“And in the the wild world of dating, that kind of quiet confidence is incredibly appealing.”